Why Most Labor Is Problematic: A Therapist's Unfiltered Take on Work, Worth, and Survival
Let's talk about something most of us are doing right now or avoiding thinking about: labor. Work. The thing that eats 40+ hours of our week and still has the audacity to demand we be "passionate" about it.
Here's the uncomfortable truth I share with clients: most labor is problematic. Not because you're lazy or ungrateful or not manifesting hard enough. Because the entire structure is built on an exchange that costs us our actual lives.
The Great Lie of "Loving Your Job"
Labor, work, jobs, "careers" — at their core, they're an exchange of your life energy for dollars. That's it. That's the transaction. Anything beyond that — including the folx who swear they "love" their jobs — is largely indoctrinated delusion.
And before anyone clutches their pearls: even the executives with their stock options, bonuses, company cars, and expense accounts covering meals and dry cleaning would quit the same day if you told them those perks were gone. Most people will not labor without value, without monetary gain, and/or for free. Because most labor — especially laboring for or under others — is not that pleasant.
This isn't cynicism. It's clarity. Anything else, is gaslighting pure and simple.
The Myth of the "Typical" Work Week
We throw around "typical" work hours like they mean something universal. They don't. When you account for gig work and polyworking, the picture shifts dramatically.
The Federal Reserve found that multiple jobholders average 35 hours at their primary job plus 13.5 hours at secondary jobs — roughly 48.5 hours per week. Meanwhile, 80% of app-based gig workers put in 20 hours or fewer weekly, overwhelmingly using gigs to supplement traditional jobs, not replace them.
The gap between perception and data comes down to measurement. The Bureau of Labor Statistics officially counts about 5.3% of workers as "multiple jobholders (polyworkers … ya heard it here!).
" Fed economists estimate the true rate could be closer to 8% because gig and self-employed work often goes uncounted. And one 2025 report found that 47% of workers hold more than one job.
So while the "standard" single-job week hovers around 35-40 hours, the lived reality for a substantial chunk of the workforce is longer. Much longer. And we're supposed to pretend this is normal, sustainable, and somehow a reflection of our worth.
Who Benefits from Your Exhaustion?
Let's be clear about the systems at play. Colonization, capitalism, white supremacy, structural racism, patriarchy, bigotry, and class divisions aren't abstract concepts — they're factors in mental health problems. They shape who gets to rest, who gets exploited, who gets called "lazy" versus "hardworking," and whose labor is rendered invisible.
The cultural messaging in the U.S. is particularly toxic. Here, being busy and overworked is worn as a badge of honor. Research shows Americans equate a packed schedule with competence and ambition. Outside the U.S., lack of leisure time is often viewed as a lack of choice or a sign of a poorly managed life.
Read that again.
In other cultures, if you have no time to rest, people assume something went wrong. In America, we assume you're winning. Are you?
What This Means for Your Mental Health
If you're exhausted, anxious, burned out, or wondering why you can't just "gratitude" your way into enjoying your job — you're not broken. You're responding rationally to an irrational system that treats your life force as a renewable resource to be extracted.
But since we must labor in this system to survive, it's important to at least labor in ways that allow us to feel better versus worse about how we're spending those (typically) 8-10 hours, 5-6 days a week. That might mean:
Setting and Maintaining Strong Limits and Boundaries that protect your non-work hours like they're sacred (because they are). Take your sick days, your vacation days and then some. Don’t volunteer to work more that what is required by your work contract.
Create and Nurture Community that doesn't center productivity as a measure of their worth (or the phone, shoes, home or vehicle you own).
Rest as a radical act, not a reward you have to earn. Sleep as much as you can and actually reset on your days off and vacations. You don’t hae to run yourself ragged being ``productive`` on your off days. Humans were not created to ``produce.`` It is not our ultimate purpose.
Honest conversations about what work actually costs you, what it really means, including that it is not what defines who we are.
The Bottom Line
Most labor is problematic because most labor under capitalism extracts more than it gives. It takes your energy, your time, your creativity, your physical health, and your peace — and returns a paycheck that rarely covers the full cost.
You're allowed to name that. You're allowed to grieve it. And you're allowed to want something different — even if we're still figuring out what that looks like together.
Disclosure: This blog article was written with the assistance of AI, after the author wrote a 6-paragraph prompt and then wrangled, wrestled, and edited the shit out of it to remove any remaining traces of patriarchal, bigoted, capitalist, right-wing, whiteness-centering bullshit. That said, the topic, themes, sociopolitical perspectives, tone, and style were derived from the author.The author uses AI because—despite the wreckage it's causing—this shit isn't going away. The author was a MySpace user in the 90s. She knows how these things go. And as a sole practitioner with a full practice, there is no way in hell she could keep up with writing a relevant, timely, thought-provoking, and inspiring weekly blog that speaks to the regular gaslighting the marginalized face, while also serving clients without the use of AI.So yes—contrary to the saying, sometimes you do need to use the master's tools to dismantle the master's house. Sorry, Audre.